have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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