Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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