i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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