my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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