Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
