And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
