Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
did i just pee glitter
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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