The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I just blew my weed a kiss
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
