that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
third nipple confirmed
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
