suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
