So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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