Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
