So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
