We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Randomize
