My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
