just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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