Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Your penis caused this!
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