I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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