You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Then you guys just all showered together...?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
