I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Blood and glitter go together right?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
