I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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