These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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