i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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