Betty ford says i'm here all night
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
