You really coming over, don't trick.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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