I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
