p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
