So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
