I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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