Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize