my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
