i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
When are your genitals available?
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
