That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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