I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Green mimosas i think yes
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
