if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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