New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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