Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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