I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
People with herpes should wear stickers.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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