Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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