she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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