So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
We are two peas in an std pod
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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