we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
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There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
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Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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