He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
