after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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