i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
