A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
