votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
