I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
