That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
