first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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